What Does It Mean to Be “Stuck in Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Fawn”?
When people think of trauma, they often picture the event itself. However, trauma is less about the event and more about how our nervous system had to adapt to survive it. It is adaptation. One way those adaptations show up is through survival states commonly known as fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.
These states are meant to protect us in moments of real danger. But when someone becomes “stuck” in them long after the threat has passed, life can feel overwhelming, unsafe, or exhausting. In addition, if this "going to the fight, flight, freeze, fawn states” is repeated, over time, you may find yourself going there a lot more quickly and easily.
The Four Survival Responses
Fight – The nervous system prepares for defence. This may look like irritability, quickness to anger, or an inner drive to control situations. While fight energy is protective, being stuck here can leave someone feeling chronically on edge.
Flight – The urge to escape. This might show up as restlessness, overworking, perfectionism, panic, or anxiety. The body is wired to outrun danger, but in daily life, it can feel like never being able to relax.
Freeze – The nervous system shuts down into immobility. This can look like dissociation, numbness, feeling “spaced out,” or difficulty making decisions. Being stuck here often feels like a disconnection from both self and others.
Fawn – This is a less talked-about response. Fawning means taking care of others’ needs over your own to stay safe. This may look like people-pleasing, avoiding conflict, or having trouble saying no. While fawning once served to reduce danger, it can create ongoing challenges with boundaries and self-worth.
What Does It Mean to Be “Stuck”?
Being “stuck” doesn’t mean someone is weak or broken. It means that their nervous system hasn’t yet fully registered that the danger is over. Instead of cycling through activation and returning to a sense of calm, the body keeps replaying the survival strategy it learned during the overwhelming experience.
This is why we say trauma lives in the body—not just in memory. Even though you logically understand it’s safe, the nervous system stays caught in a protective loop, even in safe situations. Because your body learned that it was not safe, and this state is the way to protect you, back there, back then.
Healing: Moving Beyond Survival
So, how do you heal if your nervous system is stuck in dysregulation and activation? Therapy can help gently shift the nervous system from the survival mode back into connection, safety, and resilience. This often involves:
Resourcing and regulation skills – building the ability to feel grounded and safe in the body.
Relational healing – experiencing safe, supportive connections that help the nervous system learn new patterns.
Somatic therapies – working directly with the body’s felt experience, not just thoughts.
Trauma processing – when appropriate, working through the memories that keep the body stuck in survival responses.
Healing is not about erasing fight, flight, freeze, or fawn — those responses will always exist as protective tools. Instead, it’s about helping the nervous system regain flexibility so you can move between states and return to a sense of safety more easily.
Want to work on the nervous system healing?
If you recognize yourself in fight, flight, freeze, or fawn, know that these patterns are adaptations; signs of your nervous system doing its best to protect you. With the right support, it is possible to feel more grounded, connected, and free in your body and relationships.
If you’d like to learn more about trauma therapy and somatic approaches, contact me to explore the healing journey together.
